Friday, January 19th, 2018, 7:32PM

This nourishes my soul. I saw this moment, I had to…I had to grab my phone to capture this moment. The immense, intense beauty that struck me as a result of witnessing this moment. It screams to me “This is what the Kingdom is about!” Stretching forth a hand, to be connected, to influence each other with the love of the Father’s heart. You do not forget these moments. They add fresh definition to God’s demonstrations of the Kingdom. You cannot forget such a moment. He will not let you.

Advertisements

How do you sum it up?

After this week of school, I find myself in awe. All I can ask God is, “How do you sum it up?” and “What has my life come to?”

I SAW FREAKING DEAF EARS OPEN, PEOPLE LOSE THEIR CRUTCHES AND WALKERS, SOMEOME RUNNING SO FAST AND HARD AFTER NOT BEING ABLE TO FOR A FEW YEARS AND IT SOUNDED LIKE THUNDER, I SAW PEOPLE OVERWHELMED WITH THE POWER OF GOD……..

I get to see stuff like this everyday. It was just extra super duper intensified this week with Randy Clark Healing and Impartation conference mixed in. It is what happens when hungry hearts come together, fully intent on positioning torwards Papa God. I honestly do not know how to sum any of it up other than God is so ridiculously cool, amazing, awesome….SO AWESOME!

May we never lose our sense of awe!

-1998girl

BELOVED

Sitting in class next to my revival groupie, the absolutely lovely Rachel, she leans over and whispers “Can I give you a tattoo?” I shrug my shoulders, set down my drink, and hand over my arm. I was not sure what would come of it, but I knew it would be good.  BELOVED fiery eyes […]

Cultivating Inward Motivation

It is a long story, but to the jist; being a fresh youngin’ out of home and heading off to school with no grid for proper time management has its interesting affects on oneself. 

You see, I did FABULOUSLY at the first of the school year. At least I thought so. The reality I had to recently face is that I did not. I stayed up late, constantly only had a few hours of sleep each night, operated on giant cups of coffee I brought to school (you know, instead of that thing that keeps you alive..I think it is called..wa..ter?) and I would sleep all weekend. 

I was not entirely terrible, but I was not entirely healthy. It is a refining process that I have had to give myself grace for, because you cannot turn a twelve year habit forcefully overnight. I realized I cannot expect of myself what God is not asking of me! 

Eventually I burned out, procrastinated a lot, and it came to a point before Christmas break where all of my late assignments outnumbered all the ones I had turned in on time. God said to me, “You are outwardly motivated! It is time to get yourself together.”

So, here are just a few things I have learned so far for cultivating inward motivation:

  • Open dialogue with God 24/7. I already had this going on in my outward motivation habit season, but the only reason I found out I was outwardly motivated was because of our consistant open dialogue. He poked my heart. *Boop*
  • Keep your destiny before you. Meditate on what God has done and is doing in your life. Keep in your mind that it is the little moments in life that are just as important. Lack of eventfulness does not equate to lack of impact!
  • Have some sort of basic plan for managing your time. Be intentional with God time, quality social time, study time, and then let social media be a reward rather than an obligation. 
  • Get a cup. Go to your sink. Fill your cup with that clear stuff. Sip on that every few minutes. 
  • Let yourself feel the honour of simple moments. The fact you are alive, you have a relationship with THE CREATOR OF THE UNIVERSE, how beautiful that quote is that you just read, the fact you get to be present where you are with Jesus, you have the freedom to read your Bible, sing your songs, dance your dance, post your writings, how cute that picture is on the fridge, whatever it is. Let your heart feel things, allow it to sense the depths of life within the fine details. There is a lot of beauty to behold.
  • Set a bedtime. Let yourself get the actual amount of sleep that your body LITERALLY NEEDS.
  • Meditate on the fact it is an honour to study the Bible and a great thing to learn. That you are a powerful person who powerfully chooses to do what is best and right, not out of a mentality that you “have to”, but that you get to and you choose to.


And that is what I have learned thus far. Hope it blesses you! I now have a bedtime for myself and have two assignments in on time. Yay God!


-1998girl

When you hike further than you knew you could…

This year, I did something I had never done before. I hiked to the peak of a mountain. I had never been hiking before, and being a flatlander, I certainly had never been so high above sea level. On that hike, God did a lot in me. In my every step, He stripped away fear, taught me how to enjoy process, what it means to focus with determination without over-exertion, and worked deeply into my soul the reality of relying on His strength and protection.

The day before Thanksgiving, I went on another hike. I was super excited, thinking that it was going to be a walk in the park. I had no idea that it would be hilly-er, and a longer distance than my first hike. I also had no idea I would dunk my foot perfectly into a stream and have to hike the way with a sponge of a shoe. Lol.

I keep an open dialogue with God at all times. Somewhere along the way, I had a specific chat with God, wondering if I did not conquer this trail, would it mean I accepted defeat? Would it mean I am weak? Would it mean I am giving up? What would I be giving up? Would it mean I am smart for saying I cannot do it, or would it mean I simply do not recognize my own strength, and the strength available to me from Him?

“It wouldn’t be defeat, Cassidy. But you’ll have to face this again, eventually. Why not now? Why not?”

All I could think was, “I conquered that other mountain. This one is easier! I know I can do it!” and settled it in me that as long as I had the available time to properly pace myself, I would do it. 

Instead of dealing with fear, God dealt a lot within me about the lie that I am a burden to others. I felt like a burden to the whole group, especially those who stayed behind with me. God would catch me every time I would make a negative comment about myself, 

“Well, if I’d just exercise more

Well, if I’d brought more water–

Well, if I’d remembered to eat–“


“Yeah Cassidy, if you’d done those things, it would’ve been a bit easier. But you didn’t. So quite beating yourself up. These people are willing to stick by you and help you, to carry your things, and share their food. They could go ahead, but they choose to stay by you, to help you. You are not a burden!”

I realized I was not alone, and that these people enjoyed being around me regardless of my weakness. I had to change my mindset to the fact that even when I need others’ help, I can still add value to their life. It does not mean I am a burden. It just means they are recieving from me in a different form. 

In one simple moment of turning the corner, I realize it was all worth it. “Finally. We made it.” The view was stunning. The people, even more amazing! “Yay! You made it!” 

On the way down was easy peasy!
The next day, I find out that it was a tougher hike than my first mountain. I was stunned and in awe. God said,

“See! You’re stronger than you know!”

Just because mountains in life seem like they should be easier to hike, does not mean that they are. So when you are feeling weak, just remember every other mountain, hill, or rock you have conquered. You will soon find yourself conquering rougher, and tougher things with God.


-1998girl

Purity Week!

Ahhh, Purity Week!

Recently here at BSSM, we went through what is known as “Purity Week”.

Other names for it are “Freedom Week”, “Redemption Week”, “Sex Week”, and “Moral Revolution Week.” (At least, those are all the different names I heard it called.) I like all of them, honestly, but my favourite is Purity Week.

Purity is probably the topic I am most passionate about. I love talking about it because it is such a sensitive topic in the church. I love all the vulnerability surrounding it, and I love shedding light on it.  I absolutely LOVED Purity Week because they shed light on so much that the world misuses in the dark! They are so open and vulnerable about EVERYTHING. I cannot even count how many times “sex”, “orgasm”, “masturbation”, “penis”, “vagina”, etc were said during Purity Week. I love it! The world wants to pervert all of it, but the truth is that God created us, He designed sex, and it is a very good thing! And purity does not just remain something for sexuality, it is a lifestyle.

So, here is my story regarding purity, and only a bit of what I learned during Purity Week:

Purity, sex, and everything else has always been an open, safe topic at home. Growing up, Daddy & Momma always said that if I ever had any questions, I could ask them. So, I am thankful to say I was given a safe environment to talk and learn about it as much as I wanted to.

At around 12-13, I began reading the Bible on my own and searched out scripture regarding sex, sexuality, purity, etc. My main reasoning was because I wanted to know what the actual line was for any sexual activity outside of marriage. I have never done anything sexual with a person, but at that age I did have lust in my heart and had an addiction to masturbation since I was 7. (Glory to God, I was totally and completely freed from it earlier this year!) Unfortunately, instead of going to Daddy & Momma with my questions regarding my issues, thanks to anxiety, I searched the internet to see if I was normal and what the world had to say. The world tried to convince me that masturbation was healthy and normal, and that as a Christian everything but sex was ok before marriage. I found different answers in the Bible, though.

I quickly learned that we are not supposed to lust after people, that we actually do not have to, and that any sexual activity outside of marriage is impure. Eventually in my struggle with addiction to masturbation, I asked God why I felt it was not right. “God, why isn’t this right even though I’m not lusting after anyone when I do it?” He showed me that it is because masturbation is not what we were designed for. It is a cheap cop-out to what he wants us to freely and fully experience and express inside the safety of the marriage covenant. 

Purity week confirmed a lot of what I already knew, and brought more depth to it.

They taught me practical things, such as the importance of getting your needs met in a healthy way. This means:

  • feeding yourself decent food, 
  • getting enough rest, 
  • having a bedtime, 
  • having community around you to help keep you accountable. (Accountability is described here as “Account for your ability, not your disability.”) 
  • Making sure you are cultivating healthy, intimate relationships with both genders. (Intimacy here is not a sexual thing.)

They also taught the sacredness of sex. That:

  •  inside of marriage it is not about getting to a goal, but about getting to know each other. 
  •  sexual intimacy is spirit, soul, and body. It bonds you in every way. 
  •  porn ruins your sexuality and skews your view of sex and people.

I also love the way they answered one of the most asked questions: “Why does God give us a sex drive way before we are able to get married and have sex?” It is because we are supposed to learn how to manage our sex drive! Because when you do get married, you will have to manage it even more so! Your spouse is not your sex slave, and you will also be choosing your spouse every single time there is temptation to run after someone or something else.

I do have to say, though, my favourite thing I learned during Purity Week is that Christians are actually supposed to have the best sex lives!! Haha I love it!! You know why? It is because, just as I said earlier, God created us, He designed sex, and it is a very good thing!

-1998girl